Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Anonymous Rebelius

Uncle Plato was a visionary man, an outstanding child abuser and a first-class philosopher, no question about that. His oligarchy/democracy/anarchy triptych and his theory about the propensity of democracy to decay into anarchy are still relevant today, for most of its parts. But for all the intellectual spice of his grotto's allegory, he couldn't match Corneille's Alcandre on one point: foreseeing. The advent of the Anonymous Rebelius: he didn't see that one coming.

In the human evolution process, Anonymous Rebelius was preceded by Anonymous Democratus. Anonymous Democratus was not easy to handle. He complained about laws, started a few revolutions and wars, claimed power and regularly barked for social changes. Sometimes Anonymous Democratus made silly mistakes, like sitting Napoleon in a throne or Hitler in an armchair, but he tried to learn from that. He sent his children to school, studied the past and gave his best to make his life a worthy one.

He didn't mind to be anonymous as long as he remained democratus. He wanted to be consulted every now and then on the march of the world, the price of vegetables and the TV programs. Even when he didn't vote, he wanted the right to vote. Even if he hated school, he felt it was right to have school obligations. Even if he couldn't stand authority, he was relieved to see police cars patrolling in his street.
Anonymous Democratus desired recognition as well. He sure admitted he would never be Churchill, Balzac or Elvis Presley. He heard their speeches, read their books and listened to their songs without angry feeling. He just wanted to be spotted by some as an individual, whether it was for his working skills, community commitments or love-making capacities. He could go back from work in the evening with a clear conscience. If he was an artist, he would fight his way to self-achievement. If no one knew his face, it was alright by him, as long as many knew his works.

But after a while, Anonymous Democratus went through a middle-age crisis. He looked back in history and couldn't see anylonger the starting point of democracy. He was surrounded by it, as his father and his grandfather were before him. Everybody was democratus, and despite what he read in history books, he began to consider that everybody always was. Some tribes were not democratus yet, but then they were africanus or musulmanus, and that said all. A few democratus napalm bombings or tank action and things would be sorted out soon.
And so Anonymous Democratus thought that it was time to move on. Democracy was granted at birth, it was only a case now of not staying anonymous...

Anonymous Rebelius was born in 1987, on October the 3rd. He can't sing, he can't write, he can't act, he can't work, he can't think, he can't talk, he can't learn, he can't teach, he can't swim, he can't cook. But his website has been visited by 5,000,000 viewers, he's been invited to every broadcasted TV and radio show on Earth. He made the News headlines and is hungry for more. Teenage girls wet their pants by staring at his photos on the Web. He made thousands of babies all over the world without even using his penis. He's the one name they won't forget, the one face they won't miss, until there are so many of them that he'll be lost in the crowd.

For what will happen once the queue lines in front of casting agencies will be 50 kilometers long, once everyone's story and pictures will be published online, once each individual owns his duplicate on Facebook? What will happen when Anonymous Rebelius will look around and see nothing else but other Anonymous Rebelius? He won't find it cool. He won't find it trendy. He will look back in history and maybe look with a dash of regret at the wise and quiet Anonymous Democratus.

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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

This was great